Signing up for the Evening Seminar series is the first step toward declaring a partnered future for yourself - so, congratulations!  You will be meeting with other singles in an intimate, small-group setting over four consecutive Wednesdays from 6:30 to 7:45 pm (check the Calendar for exact dates) for a £99 investment. Prior sign-up is ESSENTIAL due to the limited group size. Here are the topic areas we will explore:

What is Partnership? What is a good partnership all about?  Learning how to compromise?  Giving up freedom?  Never having to say sorry? Not being alone on Saturday nights?  Being taken care of?  Having company at Christmas and the other holidays? Partnership means different things to different people, but the researchers who study successful partnerships (in other words, the ones which endure over time, the ones where the partners themselves report feeling satisfaction) suggest that partnership is made up of certain predictable components.  The first seminar explores these partnership attributes and is based on the work of John Gottman, Ph.D. and Taylor/McGee. Chemistry – the difference between a special spark and addictive attraction – it’s not all about sex, but sex is important Emotional availability – let the past be the past, be here now Making each other a priority – leaving work at work Nurture one another – be one another’s best friend, champion and promoter, with deep affection and pride  Knowing one another deeply – really knowing one another’s dreams and dislikes  Influence – letting your partner influence you when it’s appropriate, taking a stand when you need to, knowing when to compromise  Emotional integrity – making your relationship an “emotional safe zone” to deepen trust and facilitate healing Managing conflict – communication that is honest, open and loving; peacemaking  Shared meaning – creating a life together, having shared projects, activities and dreams Spirituality and personal growth – allowing the relationship to be the crucible in which you both grow and thrive Each week there'll be an optional take-home exercise for you to explore the evening's information in more depth.

Who do you think you are?  Using a variety of light-hearted, self-administered personality tests, this evening we will explore who you are and your qualities as a potential partner.  This is an essential step often missed in the rush to figure out what type of partner is required, what assets The Other must have.  Exploration has to begin at home. Some of the key requirements to be in partnership are being present (that is, here and now, not in yesterday or tomorrow), emotionally available and physically available.  What does it mean to be truly available?  Are you: Present – not locked in the past, bound by mistakes, losses, failures or influences from childhood or adolescence NOR so focused in the future, planning for what you want to happen that you can’t be in the present moment, right here, right NOW.  It is only possible to listen deeply, be empathic and sensitive when in the present moment, an absolute necessity for rewarding relationship; Emotionally available – if past relationships are not truly complete, if issues from family of origin (such as death of a sibling or parent, divorce or other distress) continues to influence someone today, then they cannot be fully emotionally available to be in relationship; Physically available – how much time do you spend at work?  traveling for work?  with friends?  engaged in hobbies and other fun activities?  taking care of other family members? Is there room in your life for someone?  How could you design your life to incorporate a partner?  Conversely, are you expecting a partner to fill your time because you have nothing else in your life? Now you have an idea of who you are, this evening's optional take-home exercise will help you begin exploring what you want in your life, in a relationship and therefore a potential partner and will be reviewed in more detail next week.

Love is Never Enough The title of Dr. Aaron T. Beck’s book says it all: “Love is Never Enough.”  Couples may love each other deeply, be committed in every way, but unless they can communicate effectively, they are unlikely to make their relationship work over time.   Remember the old joke where she says angrily “you never tell me you love me” and he says, with surprise “but I wash your car every Sunday!” Taking a tour of the popular relationship publications (such as Gary Chapman’s The Five Love Languages – how to express heartfelt commitment to your mate and John Gray's Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus) this evening's seminar will help you assess how effectively you really communicate, especially when the heat is on.

Next steps A key question will be posed this session: What are you practicing?  Are you practicing being single? Or are you practicing preparing to be in partnership?  What do you now need to DO to get ready to be the partner others will be drawn to and want to partner with? Having examined various aspects of relationship and partnership, the final seminar in the series will summarise the topics covered and suggest ways to move ahead, including a review of the P2P Weekend Workshop topics available for deepening understanding and exploration of partnership.  You will draw up an action plan to make sure you put into practice all you've learned over the last three sessions.